A unique look at COMPARISON

Comparison, some of us know it as the thief of joy. Why? Because usually when we compare ourselves to something we deem to be greater than us it usually results in us feeling worse about ourselves. Social media has provided proof of this notion. Self-esteem has plummeted in youth and adults alike due to watching everyone around us being or appearing to be great and us waiting impatiently and praying for our time to be great has a tremendous impact on our thoughts and how we view ourselves. I’ll be honest, I ask myself when I post certain things that appear “big” or somewhat “amazing,” deep down I wonder how this is impacting others. My greatest hope is that I’m inspiring others to be great and communicating to them that I am just like them however I’m not ignorant to the fact that somewhere, someone is watching me and believing that I have something that they do not, that I am something they….. CANNOT BE. This could not be further from the truth. While my calling and life is most likely different from theirs, many different types of greatness are found within us all. Stupid social media lol, oh how I hate/love you. I’m sure we have all heard this, but I would be remiss not to start with the obvious so now, let’s touch on comparison in a way we talk about much less. Let’s go deeper on this topic if you are willing. Sometimes, comparison brings us an (ill-timed) comfort. Meaning sometimes we actually compare ourselves to make us FEEL BETTER at times when we need to actually feel the PRESS to BECOME BETTER. Sometimes we rob ourselves of that PUSH to do better, be better and become more by comparing ourselves to things that aren’t so great. For example, oftentimes we mention what we COULD BE doing when we should be thinking of what we SHOULD BE doing. Instead of feeling the press to become better leaders, parents, employees, spouses etc; we compare ourselves to those who are far worse to make us feel better about where we lack. We usually start out by saying “at least I’m not like such and such,” this person usually being on skid row, or some type of completely burned out, severely lacking or otherwise evil and depraved human being. Often, these examples are extreme. We will compare ourselves to the worst of the worst in an attempt to tell ourselves we really aren’t that bad. I often wonder why, when we are confronted with the OPPORTUNITY to become the BEST, we compare ourselves to the absolute WORST. Alcholics comparing themselves to drug addicts, verbally abusive parents comparing themselves to physically abusive parents. Cheaters comparing themselves to those who beat (guilty in my lifetime more than once on this one) When presented with the OPPORTUNITY to go for greater within, the only thing we can manage to do is fight to protect our bruised ego’s. (smh) The resulting product is providing ourselves comfort when we actually needed to feel the burn a bit; to give ourselves a break from having our already fragile, sense of self damaged all the more. The question actually is, does it? My answer………….. a big fat NOPE!!!! It actually does the opposite, the comfort we so readily offer ourselves is often out of time and context and gives us more time to lay in the MUD and continue to be less than we could be, MUCH LONGER than we actually should. Why would I brag about being a model prisoner when the real thing I should be considering is how I don’t belong in prison and when I get out how I will make sure I don’t return. Refusing to compare ourselves to the bottom of the barrel releases us to reflect on who we really are. The ONLY thing I want to compare myself to is MY ORIGINAL (GOD GIVEN) DESIGN. My focus should be on who I was constructed to be and asking myself, how I am matching up with that at this point of my life. We won’t always be there (where we need to be) by any means, but courage is necessary for those who aspire to go HIGHER! Sparing my ego is not what’s best for me. I’d like to rid myself of ego and pride as it always seems to get me into the dumbest of circumstances. Let’s be honest, when we are feeling low, we compare ourselves to strangers or those whom we know who appear to be doing better. When we want to feel higher/better, we compare ourselves among those whom we perceive to be lower than us. Sure, its ok to be inspired by or admire others but when we don’t do it properly it results in us feeling inadequate. And when you feel inadequate and have a low view of self, it always results in us living, talking, thinking and ultimately being that way. My conclusion, comparison all the way around is BAD NEWS BEARS. Lets avoid it, run our own race, be inspired by others and avoid the question of why we are not good enough along with comparing ourselves with the very worst just to feel better for the moment 


With much love, thought and consideration

Jovon Dangerfield